Tuesday, June 05, 2007

Life In Transition

Do you ever feel friendships are like taking a ride on an elevator? We go in, we come out. Some journeys are long, others short. Some of us journey together, some alight first, some linger. Some choose not to get on. Sometimes, we even find ourselves travelling alone... There are times we go up, then other times we head down. When there are glitches we instinctively (?) hit the 'alarm' button. And all the while, we have choices.

I've been thinking about the phrase 'people come, people go' alot lately.

Perhaps it's the recent slew of departures that's made me ponder about the transcient nature of friendships both here, and in SGP.

Us with Reubs on his last day in London (2 June)

Chor chan (ex-SONY), during her 1 week stay with us

Through the years, I've certainly had my share of people come in and out of my life. Some have decided they like me enough to stay the long haul. Others have made pit stops, and in a flash, they're gone.

I've been in London for 11 months but save for a fistful, the other friendships have turned out to be short-lived. Sure, we've had chats, we've exchanged numbers, we've even met up for playdates or coffee sessions. But all too soon, many return to their home country, move away, or simply 'disappear'. I suppose some knew before I did that they were my 'transitional people'. And sadly in the UK, I am not short of them.

Perhaps that's the way it's meant to be. Afterall, I'm only in the UK for 24 mths. What am I expecting? To be lifelong penpals with some of the people I've met here, after I return to my life in SGP? What am I, 12?

Perhaps these people are aware I'm here for a short stint and thus friendships will not go further than a smile every time we meet, exchanging niceties, and a playdate or two. Afterall, what's the point of deepening a friendship with someone who's going to leave anyway?

Does this make me their transitional person then? Am I a temporary 'filler' who's good to have but not worth investing time and effort on? Perhaps I'm the 'intermission' before they move onto something else, someplace else, or someone else in their lives.

Whatever the scenario, these transitional folk have done little to assuage my desire for deeper friendships...

I can choose to bemoan the ephemeral nature of friendships here. But I won't. Deep in the recesses of my mind, I know these deciduous people were placed in my life for a reason. Some have left positive marks in my life, and for that, I'm grateful to God they stopped by, however fleetingly.

Next year, Dee, Danielle and I join the ranks of those who have gone before us, where our faces will fade out of existence in London. But while we're still 'in transit', I'd like us to leave footprints over the lives of our friends here. I hope they'll remember us fondly, as we will of them.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

hey there,

know exactly what u mean having moved from cty to cty to cty ... some acquaintances have indeed stuck on as long-term buddies, others have just dissapeared ... and i'm probably a huge culprit cos i'm terrible at keeping up ...

perhaps i'm also one of those who's really happy with my family and few close friends ... but like u said, and now when i look back, those that have passed me by all had their reason for being there during that point in time and i've certainly haven't forgotten them ... your blog has however certainly reminded me to thank God for putting them there then ...

hugs, mabes

As The Deer said...

Hmmm your post and Mabe's makes me think of my days studying overseas and of the people I met. Like Pat, the school librarian who was the kindest and sweetest lady - a little piece of Daddy shining out to help light the darkness around me then. I used to call her Daddy's Post-it note to me...

I believe that we are all love letters of God's to each other... a "post-it note" to remind each other that He listens, He knows and that He cares.

Maybe when you are at your loneliest, He sends you a smile or a kind word through these people you've been surrounded by in UK.

Sometimes, He also makes His presence and His love known through complete strangers!

God puts people and words in our lives when we most need it, He puts us in places to help us grow even more... whatever it is - this is the day that the Lord has made we will rejoice and be glad in it!

2 years are passing by in a blink of an eye. Feels long yet isn't as long as you think it'd be eh?

I still dream of Brighton from time to time. I can still remember the route from my school to my host mum's place. If I close my eyes, I can still see the route... lol. It might have changed since then...hehe

yider said...

dear,
have been secretly loving ur blog and
share bits & pieces of ur life without making a sound. love whatever
u've shared and my short short ride with you certainly stays. ^_^